This week, I put 101 miles on my car driving across the broad Phoenix metropolitan area to attend the opening night reception of the National Resume Writers Association conference. In a room of roughly 35, I knew fewer than 10 (all members or past members of the Resume Writers and Coaches Association), and I met a few more with whom I’d corresponded via email and LinkedIn. And I even received a lovely gift from a colleague.
Why would I take on such a drive—at night, no less, when I hate night driving—to go to an in-person networking event? It’s because I know how important it is to build and maintain relationships with people in real life (IRL), going beyond the Zoom rectangles and the asynchronous social media comments. Face-to-face connections build a level of trust and memorability that’s hard to match online.
Unfortunately, most professionals avoid networking. Or worse yet, they do it begrudgingly and, therefore, poorly. For job seekers, the thought of networking, which they often perceive as schmoozing to ask for a job opportunity, is, at a minimum, icky and, at the high end, terrifying.
For those of you who shun networking, hang in there. I’m going to provide you with some tips that will help you approach in-person events as your authentic self so that you can be more effective and get more out of it. And yes, this even goes for those of you who aren’t terribly outgoing.
Why Network In-Person?
In the age of instant communications, why should you even add in-person networking to your calendar? That’s a valid question, and here’s the short answer: We build relationships more quickly in a three-dimensional world. While it can happen online and over Zoom, it will happen faster when you’re standing face to face with people, learning about them and sharing about yourself.
In-person networking gives you three big advantages:
- Immediate rapport. Conversations flow more easily when you can read tone and body language. It’s how genuine connection forms.
- Visibility. Showing up and being seen reminds people you exist and positions you as an active, engaged professional.
- Serendipity. Some of the best opportunities happen by accident. The person standing next to you at the buffet line could be your next client, collaborator, or hiring manager.
Online networking is powerful for maintaining relationships. But if you want to build new ones—especially as a forward-thinking job seeker—getting out there is still the best way to do it.
Shift Your Perspective to Build Authenticity
Few people feel comfortable with the sleezy salesperson approach to networking. You know the one: Shaking hands with a business card at the ready, attempting to spend a total of 15 seconds with everyone they can within the set timeframe. Yuck. That’s not fun, and it’s certainly not genuine.
Instead, try a different approach. Instead of thinking of the event as a time to market or sell yourself, reframe your approach to learning about people. You’re taking the time to explore what they do, why they’re at the event, and how you can help them.
When you approach conversations with genuine curiosity, you’re no longer looking to impress people. Instead, you’re creating space for authentic conversations, and that’s what leads to connections and relationships.
To achieve this seamlessly, develop your strategy. Set your intention for the meeting. What’s your goal? Here are a couple of suggestions:
- Meet three new people and learn something interesting about or from each.
- Reconnect with people in your industry and learn a new tidbit about what’s current.
You’ll enjoy yourself a lot more without the pressure of having (a) to perform or (b) a tangible outcome. Instead, you’re planting seeds and creating connections.
RWCA members at NRWA conference
Create Your Networking Strategy
Whether you love networking in person or hate it, having a strategy will help you stay focused, enjoy success, and walk out with more than just business cards. Here’s a simple outline of how you can prepare for nearly any meeting, event, or conference:
Research the event.
If possible, find out who’ll be attending and what the focus or topic of the event is. This is often achieved on the website or in the program and will help you frame your conversations and questions appropriately.
Practice your introduction.
You must be prepared to shake hands (or give hugs, if you know the people) and answer the “What do you do?/What’s new?” question. While most networkers will answer with a job title, you can immediately differentiate yourself by providing a description. No, this isn’t a “pitch,” per se, but it should share how you help and invite questions. As a job seeker, you might say:
“I’m currently searching for a position as a CFO in the healthcare or insurance industry. I helped a community hospital build a solid strategy for growth that positioned them as a regional leader.”
In just a few seconds, you’ve given them enough information to know how they can help and sparked a conversation.
Be ready with open-ended questions.
Open-ended questions allow you to start conversations, which is the entire goal of chatting with people. Instead of just asking what people do, dig deeper with inquiries that support your curiosity and invite people to talk about themselves. These might include:
- “What brings you to this event?”
- “How did you get into your field?”
- “What’s been keeping you busy lately?”
Have business cards or a QR code.
If you make good connections, you’ll want to follow up after the event. The easiest way to do this is with a business card, which you can design and have printed through Canva or your local printer. If that doesn’t make sense for you, share your QR code. LinkedIn makes this very easy on their app, or you can download a digital business card app, such as HiHello.
Prepare a graceful exit.
After the business cards have been exchanged (or not, as the case may be), it’s time to make a clean getaway. While this might sound awkward, it’s actually quite easy, given the fact that everyone at the event is there to meet multiple people. Simply interject something like: “It’s been great talking with you. I’m going to mingle a bit more, and I look forward to connecting on LinkedIn.”
Maintain a positive attitude.
No one wants to chat with someone who looks sullen or reticent to be there. A smile is your greatest tool in the networking game, so use yours liberally. Make eye contact and say hello. Everyone is there to meet people, and it’s okay to talk to strangers.
Take care of yourself.
I understand that even for the biggest extrovert, networking can be draining. And if you’re an introvert? Well, let’s just say you need to safeguard yourself so you’re ready for the next event!
It’s okay to step away for a few minutes while you’re at a meeting or conference. Get a drink, visit the restroom, or just step outside and check your phone for a bit. Do whatever you need to do to get recentered and refreshed before reengaging with the group.
And remember: there’s no rule that you have to stay for the entire event. Show up a little late and leave a little early, if needed. Just don’t use introversion or fear as a crutch. Give yourself a minimum bar of success: time spent at the event or people met, as examples. That way, you’ll have that goal to complete and can leave early knowing you did what you planned to do.
Networking Is Pointless without Follow-Up
Networking is just the start of building connections. Truly, for them to stick, you must have a plan for what to do after. My suggestion is to follow up in two key ways: via LinkedIn and email. If, however, you made a strong connection, there’s nothing wrong with making a phone call.
Follow up via LinkedIn.
I am on LinkedIn all day every day, so I always think to go there first. Find the person on the site and either send an InMail or a connection request with a note (don’t forget the note!):
“Hi, Jordan. It was great to meet you at the Chamber reception last night! I enjoyed chatting about AI in healthcare and hope you’ll join my network.”
Do this within a day, lest they forget you.
Even better, after they accept your connection request, reach out with a brief introduction:
“Thanks for accepting my connection request. I look forward to continuing to learn about you and supporting you here on LinkedIn.
“As I mentioned last night, I’m currently searching for a position as a CFO in the healthcare or insurance industry. I helped a community hospital build a solid strategy for growth that positioned them as a regional leader. My profile shares many of my accomplishments and experiences.
“When not job searching, I enjoy spending time with my family, cooking, and traveling. I’m also an avid reader.
“Let me know how I can help you.”
Follow up via email.
For those people not on LinkedIn all the time (What? The travesty!), email is a great backup. Plus, you’ll have more space to share information.
Via email, you can put the two LinkedIn emails together: an introduction/reminder of your meeting as well as what you’re looking for.
Maintain the connection.
As you might expect, networking isn’t a one-and-done approach. If you are able to connect on LinkedIn, that’s ideal because then you’ll see each other’s posts. And you can also reach out on a set cadence to share an article or something that might interest them. Remember to give first; getting comes naturally later.
In-Person Networking Suggestions
There are plenty of great places to network, but if you’re new to the game, where do you start?
- Chambers of Commerce attract a variety of community leaders, and they typically welcome visitors. You’ll usually find breakfast events, lunch and learns, and evening mixers.
- Professional associations host regular mixers and are an excellent place for job seekers, who will meet the movers and shakers in the industry where they want to work.
- Conferences and trade shows, such as the NRWA conference opening reception I attended Monday, put you front and center with people from across industries and locales.
- If you are close to your alma mater, alumni events help you to connect with people who share something of significance with you.
- Referral and leads groups, such as BNI or LeTip, meet weekly, and members are trained to share referrals. They’ll be tuned in to a vast, diverse network of people who may be able to help you in your job search.
- Volunteering is an opportunity to give back while building your network. Events are posted on Facebook, LinkedIn, and Meetup.
Truly, every room you walk into is a potential opportunity to learn something new, strengthen your professional identity, and be remembered.
Networking Is an Investment in Your Future
Here’s the truth: networking doesn’t pay off overnight. It is most definitely a long game. But when you keep showing up in person, online, and always with intention, your network starts to work for you. At this point, I rarely go to an event where I don’t know anyone, and I head to known people first, who are invariably speaking with people I don’t know, so a warm introduction quickly follows.
With consistent networking, you’ll become known not just for what you do, but for who you are. People will start to think of you when opportunities arise because you’ve built credibility with them. They know, like, and trust you. And that’s the real goal. Not collecting business cards or LinkedIn connections, but cultivating relationships that feel genuine, reciprocal, and built to last. The next time you receive an invitation for a reception, luncheon, or mixer, go!
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